BEAUTIFUL BASTARD by Christina Lauren

 In Erotic Romance

cover23350-mediumBEAUTIFUL BASTARD (Original Title THE OFFICE)

Author: Christina Lauren
Rating: 2.95 out of 5 Stars (I almost liked it)
Genre: Erotic Romance
Format: EBook, Print
Publisher: Gallery Books
Release Date: February 12, 2013 (Reissue)
Recommended Reading: 18+

Received a free copy in exchange for an honest review


THE GIST: Apparently this book, originally titled The Office, is yet another work of Twilight erotic fan fiction, being reissued with a sexy cover and new character names. Let me start by saying that this book had so much potential. It really did. The work dynamic between the two lead protagonists was sexy, the setting was perfect, but sex is no substitute for a storyline. Not by a long shot. This mediocre book about a boy with a creepy panty fetish falling for the girl who likes to be treated like a back alley hooker, fell face first on a pile of bad erotica circa 2012.

SYNOPSIS: “An ambitious intern. A perfectionist executive. And a whole lot of name calling. Discover the story that garnered more than two million reads online.

Whip-smart, hardworking, and on her way to an MBA, Chloe Mills has only one problem: her boss, Bennett Ryan. He’s exacting, blunt, inconsiderate—and completely irresistible. A Beautiful Bastard.

Bennett has returned to Chicago from France to take a vital role in his family’s massive media business. He never expected that the assistant who’d been helping him from abroad was the gorgeous, innocently provocative—completely infuriating—creature he now has to see every day. Despite the rumors, he’s never been one for a workplace hookup. But Chloe’s so tempting he’s willing to bend the rules—or outright smash them—if it means he can have her. All over the office.

As their appetites for one another increase to a breaking point, Bennett and Chloe must decide exactly what they’re willing to lose in order to win each other. Originally only available online as The Office by tby789—and garnering over two million reads on fan fiction sites—Beautiful Bastard has been extensively updated for re-release.” (Netgalley)

THE LOWDOWN: When I began reading this book I thought I was really going to dig it. It had the perfect amount of sexy and conflict. I saw where it was going and I liked it. The problem was it took forever to get there, bogged down by repetitive desensitizing sex scenes. Numbing should be a product of hundreds of reads, not one. Don’t get me wrong it was not the copious amounts of sex that left me anesthetized, it was because they were almost all identical. The formula was a literary rinse cycle; rip panties, have sex, insult the girl, repeat. It felt like the author couldn’t come up with a long enough story, so she just made the characters have sex like bunnies on amphetamines. I kept wishing for what I already knew would happen, to happen already.

Under it all, however, was a story that I liked and could have loved if only there was more of it. The guy, a hotshot executive, was drool worthy, completely alpha, but instead of making him a macho, watch-me-beat-my-chest-like-a-gorilla-then-rip-off-your-panties lover, the author made him a rich megalomaniac with a panty sniffing fetish. But even that could be overlooked, because he was admittedly, kind of sexy. The girl on the other hand, with her treat-me-like-a-prostitute-because-I-need-to-make-a-life-for-myself self-deprecating behavior, was less than appealing. Was I supposed to root for a woman who liked to be treated like a $2 hooker by a boss she supposedly hated and was I supposed to believe that this overachiever smarty-pants can’t figure out that what she really wants is to be loved? Um, no.

If formulaic sex scenes with hot guys who have creepy underwear hoarding addictions and girls who like to be treated like “the help” is your brand of hot, then by all means, buy this book. But for me “what ifs” and “coulda beens” ain’t good enough, even if some of the book is great.


Sara O'Connor
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